Hey guys, How many healthy relationships do you see out there? The number of healthy relationships out there, while increasing due to some of the awareness being brought to the concept, is still pretty low. Why is that? I once believed I had great parents. In retrospect, I realize that there was no real love shown between them. There was never an: I love you exchanged that I ever witnessed. Why should that be such a big deal?
When there is no love shown between the parents, it creates insecurity in their children. In my case, when I went out into the dating world, I was shy and insecure. I didn’t feel as though I had anything to offer. I felt unloved and unlovable. When children grow up around parents that do not show love to each other, children in turn perpetuate that in their own relationships in the future. Is that the type of relationship that you want for your children? The same kind of loveless, trapped relationship you may be in now? One you may have been exposed to by your own parents?
Before you go further, read 10 signs of a healthy relationship
Parents stay together for years without showing the proper example of a loving, healthy relationship to their children. This in turn makes the kids think: That’s just the way things are. They become emotionally and mentally conditioned and anchored into feeling like dysfunctional relationships are normal. If the parents had worked to maintain a healthy relationship, or separated into other, healthier relationships, the kids might have had a clue by the time they reached their own teenage dating years.
I had one friend who was married to a girl that he got pregnant at the age of 16 or 17. Over the years, what may have seemed like love at first, turned into a marriage solely for the sake of the children. He began to have an affair. She started gaining weight – a lot of weight. She was seeking her happiness in food and using it to fill her up with that feel good sensation she was missing in her marriage.
At a wedding for a mutual friend, both the husband and wife shot one negative barb after another at each other. Both of their boys were extremely obese, very unhappy, and had very low self-esteem. These children hadn’t even reached dating age and they were already caught in the same trap of misery perpetuated by their parents. They will probably end up seeking out the same type of relationships for themselves, never knowing that there can be better for them. They will end up perpetuating the pain for another generation.
Parents may think they are staying together for the sake of the children, but kids need to see parents in happy, loving, supportive relationships.
The choices you make in your relationship life can certainly have an impact on the other people around you, especially the kids. There is also the impact on yourself to consider, as well as the happiness of the other person in the relationship. I have already said it before – if you are not growing together in a direction, then maybe you need to consider going your separate ways, so that you can continue to grow. The quality of your life is in direct proportion to the quality of the people you consistently spend your time with. That’s something to think about!
The ultimate impact in a relationship that involves children is how they carry their own relationship knowledge forward with them, into the next generation. Your legacy to your children should be learning what unconditional love looks like, not only in your love for them, but in your love for your partner. Your example is what sets the way for them to find the same kind of love in their lives in the future. Ultimately, the only way to see healthier relationships around us is to be a part of building our own happiness and letting it follow forward through the next generation.
How many healthy relationship do you see out there? i hope after reading this post, your will be among the very few healthy ones.
Thanks for reading……..
credit: Corey Wayne